Nouvelle Année

As we grow up, the realization of the redundancy of the concept of New Year Resolutions and the understanding of growing from within begin to dawn upon us.  We change, mature and a counted few introspect. So what do we see ourselves being when we see ourselves in retrospect 2013? What do we expect from 2014? If you’ve been the fortunate, yet unfortunate victim of being hit by life hard in your guts, you’d probably ask for some time; to be stable again. If you think you’re just living by your years on earth, then probably you’re asking for a reason to get by yet another year. If you’ve been unproductive and you have any conscience that stabs you every time you think you’ve been a useless butt, then you ask for opportunities. Mostly, people expect change. I do, too.

But this end of the year, I’m scared of what is to begin.

You see, Decembers have been pretty eventful for me since 2009; the year I see myself growing up to be aware of a world around me. This December, on the other hand, ends on a peaceful and ordinary note. Obviously then, end of 2013 means the beginning of a 2014 and that means a new cycle which scares me. I don’t have anything to keep focusing on, or to think about or to forget about. I’m a blank slate and it’s terrifying to wonder what chalks would be thrown at me. But I’ve taken life as it comes to me and gotten over things and I’ve learnt that it’s okay to take the leap.

And so I shall, again.

I’ll want to let myself bloom; into all things I’ve aspired to be, all things that I’ve worked for and most importantly, all things I’ve dreamt of. It’s a long road, but I shall take it and embark on a journey. I hope the journey shows me who I am; for that’s what I’ve been searching for, trying to discover. I hope I make the journey worthwhile when I get there.

For one thing is sure. If life ever throws me into movie scene, I don’t want to come across a someone who is what I wanted to be and break into a million pieces. I want to be and I shall be happy in my own shoes and that shall be, when I take that journey. I know I have plans, but for now…

Hello 2014, let’s see what you’ve got!