Apparently, Twilight is so popular cuz teenagers can relate to it.

Oh yeah, I remember that time when I was a vampire.

Reblogged from: http://www.infinityonpause.blogspot.in/

Blank Verse

I wonder if you've ever thought if it was the hypocrisy of the litmus paper or the brute strength of the worker; that we see different colours on the paper with acid and with base and we think gold to be malleable. I wonder if you ever pondered if people change or if it was your mistake or your delusion that you stand here stranded.

Every tide rises and falls but are our expectations meant to experience the same crests and troughs? Why did you think he meant it all? Why do you think she’ll come back? Why do we crash and burn to realize that we are but a small dot in the cosmic order of universe and our existence shall mean nothing and yet we nurture the desire of a thousand burning suns to be remembered?

Write me an elegy?

Every day we die a little; optimists would argue that before that death, we bloom into life. Every day. Call me what you want to but every day I realize that people are a killjoy, social media is an exaggeration, life is a never-ending Ekta Kapoor serial except it stretches longer than 10 years if you’re lucky (or unlucky maybe?), and no matter how much you do to create value for your life, yourself or just the days you live and as they go by you shall realize that all this grandeur is doomed to turn into just a speck of dust one day.

Can you watch the past go up in smoke now?

Do you think it’s time that you introspect, then. Your decisions, their consequences. Perhaps this is your life’s ode to the winds of change and this is the time you could cut reason some slack. She loved him. He didn't say it. So she had to walk away. It hurt. But was there another way?

“Maybe it was because I was never verbose or my ego came in the way.

Maybe it was ignorance or just sheer selfishness on your part but maybe it was time to stop chasing you since you loved the running away.”

Stoneheart!

Inspiration: Thomas Gray "Elegy Written In A Country Courtyard"

Nouvelle Année

As we grow up, the realization of the redundancy of the concept of New Year Resolutions and the understanding of growing from within begin to dawn upon us.  We change, mature and a counted few introspect. So what do we see ourselves being when we see ourselves in retrospect 2013? What do we expect from 2014? If you’ve been the fortunate, yet unfortunate victim of being hit by life hard in your guts, you’d probably ask for some time; to be stable again. If you think you’re just living by your years on earth, then probably you’re asking for a reason to get by yet another year. If you’ve been unproductive and you have any conscience that stabs you every time you think you’ve been a useless butt, then you ask for opportunities. Mostly, people expect change. I do, too.

But this end of the year, I’m scared of what is to begin.

You see, Decembers have been pretty eventful for me since 2009; the year I see myself growing up to be aware of a world around me. This December, on the other hand, ends on a peaceful and ordinary note. Obviously then, end of 2013 means the beginning of a 2014 and that means a new cycle which scares me. I don’t have anything to keep focusing on, or to think about or to forget about. I’m a blank slate and it’s terrifying to wonder what chalks would be thrown at me. But I’ve taken life as it comes to me and gotten over things and I’ve learnt that it’s okay to take the leap.

And so I shall, again.

I’ll want to let myself bloom; into all things I’ve aspired to be, all things that I’ve worked for and most importantly, all things I’ve dreamt of. It’s a long road, but I shall take it and embark on a journey. I hope the journey shows me who I am; for that’s what I’ve been searching for, trying to discover. I hope I make the journey worthwhile when I get there.

For one thing is sure. If life ever throws me into movie scene, I don’t want to come across a someone who is what I wanted to be and break into a million pieces. I want to be and I shall be happy in my own shoes and that shall be, when I take that journey. I know I have plans, but for now…

Hello 2014, let’s see what you’ve got!

Coffee Beans

I stirred my coffee over and over waiting to see some foam on the top.  Across the counter, memories swirled on the steam that plastered the window on that beautiful snowy morning.

“Aditi, whenever you need to talk, I just want to let you know that I have your back.” I lingered. Good people don’t go out of your life until you wish them away. Vasavi came back around and I was glad.

“Main nahin sehti” the joy that this statement brought to me was inexplicable. I almost forgot my compulsion to stir the coffee. There aren’t many cool people you find in the multitude of drama you’ll see walking around you every day in college. I smiled when I thanked my fortunes for having met Vibhawari.

“I’m happy that you’re happy”  and I get back to my coffee. I take a sip. It needs more coffee beans. I forget how much I put in and enough is never enough, it seems. Just as he forgets things. Prabhat can be annoying. But just as I said this in my head, things fell into place. After all, just as coffee beans keep giving out colour to the milk even if they’re not just enough for the perfect coffee yet, he comes around. He doesn’t have to be around to do things or think things he wants to for you, about you.

And another thought raced to my mind. I took a deep breath. There’s something that gives. She lends me something that I seem to need a lot of times. I suddenly stand straight, charged. I put my coffee down. I have to set up the counter for work. Eesha’s work obsession is something I could never match but her persona may have put some pieces of my puzzle into place for me. I am more of my own person when she’s around.

I sighed. I had too many coffee beans in my coffee now. I put more sugar to regain the balance. I chuckled as that could have made some metaphorical sense, too. Lit kids, pfft! But then it’s not a lost cause. Aayush does give the best pep talk. I’ve never heard better. He could even beat the girls who think they’re the “best” at this.

The bell tinkled and the door opened. My reverie broke and it startled me. My coffee jumped right out of my mug right into the sink. I looked back to see who came in and then right back into the sink.

“Ah! I need more coffee beans!”

Independence Day

Today let's take a minute to thank our soldiers who sacrifice, to remember those who first tried to take out that bunch of warring whites. To remind ourselves ourselves that we still have a long way to go; because we may have got this country back from foreign hands but we still don't have the country in hands of our own.

Today is Independence day; probably the only day when all of us unanimously call this country 'ours'. Hence it is a Happy Independence Day, indeed.

But let's think of all the other days when we don't associate ourselves with our country; all those times we wish we had a green card and scoot from here; all those minutes we spend talking about how "these Indians" drive or don't vote or can't maintain queues and procedures, etc. or how everything in India is 'just like that' and how nobody tried to change it.

How much is our country- is India- really our own?

I hope we work towards that from this moment on because today's momentum will probably remain unparalleled for the rest of the year. Even if you start with a thought, it's still a beginning for it's the thought that counts. And every thought sown reaps into an action that reaps into a character and trust me- we could really use a few genuinely patriotic souls around here! And I can bet you think so too.

Do tell me how you plan to start making India you own country today!

The story of our lives!

So it's exam time and here's what flashes in front of my eyes:

College Starts:                                                           



Every Class:                                                               



As Exams Approach:                                                



On Seeing The Syllabus                                             



Night Before The Exam:                                              



On The Day Of The Exam:                                       


On Seeing The Paper:                                                    


After Coming Out Of The Exam Hall:                          


Before The Last Exam:                                                 




At The End Of The Semester Exams:                           




The First Week After Exams End:                                  




The Week Before The Results Come Out:                    




When The Result Comes Out:                                    




2 Days Later:                                                                

Politically Incorrect

Disclaimer: No matter how much I feel intrigued by people who're politically incorrect and do controversial stuff... this is something I witnessed and was aghast by it. So, here's what I have to tell you!

So I’ve been on hiatus since really long I know! Blame it on the bazillion things I’ve been busy with! Internships, assignments, MUN conferences (oh I had one of my most memorable and special ones) and then other riff-raff. Who doesn’t have that?
So well, to reiterate, I’ve been busy! :P
But I’m back and I’ve been perturbed about quite a few things since a few weeks. From redundancy of facebook and whatsapp to hypocrisy and what not! I almost decided to become a social recluse. It was like mid-Class 10 and early Class 11 all over again! But well, did not happen. So, what do I come here with?
I just witnessed the cheapest things happening in my college. And they’ve got me utterly upset and disturbed. Let me start from the beginning. We’ve got elections in a few days’ time and campaigning has been going on. So well we had something called an informal confrontation where there are no teachers and well you can ask the ‘real’ questions from the candidates. Real? Whatever that’s supposed to mean.
So I enter the café, that afternoon and I see a large crowd gathered looking at participants. The participants did some extremely cheap things as a part of their dare. If I could exercise my freedom of speech and expression to the fullest, you’d have known and would have probably understood what a shock that was. And that was so wrong that I just walked out. It was just wrong on so many levels that I can’t even begin to explain. News says that one of them cried later.
So, a lot of you might argue that what was happening was fun. A lot of you would probably just say that it was a show and that I could just enjoy. Some of you might not understand why I reacted the way I did even if you agree that what was happening wasn’t good. Honestly, apart from my belief that sexuality is not something that should be so openly discussed and hence I couldn’t be a part of something where I was contributed as an audience, I couldn’t reason with my reaction, either.
But as I couldn’t get over my upset state of mind and thought more and more about what I had witnessed that afternoon, I realized I was aghast at what their idea was of ‘fun’, ‘informal introduction’ and more importantly, ‘campaigning for votes’. And not just that. This is a college where the anthem of ‘Feminism’ is sounded probably the loudest. And if I had seen some random bunch of girls doing this, I wouldn’t have minded all that much. But I just saw girls reduce themselves to mere bodies and do everything that the feminist discourse criticizes. They’re perpetrating what all feminine-kind has been trying to fight and resist universally. And not just ANY group of girls, but girls who’re going to be shouting at the top of their lungs about Feminism and representing what our college is essentially trying to embody, once they get elected. What did they just show me then?
That they’re just a bunch of hypocrites who’d do anything for votes. People who don’t take any ideology too seriously. Do I want to vote for such people? I don’t think so.
Another point here. There were some girls who didn’t agree to what was being asked of them but still did it. Like the girl who ended up crying. My sympathies with them but I still won’t vote for them. Because they’ve shown me how they just broke when they faced peer pressure. So somebody who can be so easily pushed around won’t be able to take a stand and would definitely bow down in front of authority and would just be the teachers’ pet doing as they say and not brining any relief for students who wish for some leeway in this school-like college.
My question to all of them for is: Forget your agenda for college. Tell me what you principals you stand by for yourself.
I’ve been reading Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte. And I just recently, a few days back, came across some very powerful lines that I can’t help finding pertinent to this situation.
“I will hold to the principals received by me when I was sane, and not mad- as I am now. Laws and principals are not for times when there is no temptation: they are for moments such as this, when body and soul rise in mutiny against their rigour; stringent are they; inviolate they shall be. If at my individual convenience I might break them, what would be their worth? They have a worth- so I have always believed; and if I cannot believe it now, it is because I am insane- quite insane, with my veins running fire, and my heart beating faster than I count its throbs. Preconceived opinions, forgone determinations are all I have at this hour to stand by; there I plant my foot. ”
These are immensely powerful lines and I was really happy and surprised to see something come up in this book which I have followed so closely myself.
And finally, you might think I’m judging but then one, it’s not so easy to not rule judgments at them for this. Two, I’m not judging them and that’s why even when I find this to be so amoral I am disturbed that I can’t even hold it against them.
What I’ve decided now is that I’m going to abstain from voting entirely. I know that I have no other choice apart from people who were at that confrontation that day. I also know that I can’t vote for such people. Lastly, I know that there’s no way I can prevent them from coming to form the Union; if not one then another will be there. Hence, I’d just stand clear and not contribute to something that I so strongly disapprove of.
No matter how insignificant this may be, I’m going to be satisfied with myself and my decision. I hope my silence has finally been heard and understood if not agreed to.
When I discussed this with a few friends they disapproved of how I wanted to stay away from this politics and how I can’t be apolitical but this is my stand, nevertheless. Please do leave your comments and let me know what you think about it!